Early Childhood Family Education helps many Minnesota parents over the rough spots of the early years. But many are left wishing for some place to turn when potty training trouble is over and homework troubles begin and toddler separation anxiety gives way to sleepovers.
Last September, a group of dedicated ECFE parents and educators launched a new Parenting Education Program for school-age parents at Rondo Community Center in St. Paul. PEP evolved through a partnership between St. Paul Community Education and the Working Family Resource Center, a St. Paul nonprofit. At the end of the first eight-week session, parents were thrilled.
"It’s been a touchstone in my life relating to parents in the same boat. No more floundering in isolation," says Kirsten Walsh, mother of three kids ages 6, 9, and 11.
Walsh was among a core group of parents who first identified the need for PEP during a "concerns and celebrations" rehash in ECFE. "ECFE was such an important tool for articulating problems and having other parents shape perspective around them," she says. "Carrying this resource to the next stage seemed like a no-brainer. It was just a matter of how."
A big part of that "how" came through the expertise and guidance of Jill Chisholm, longtime St. Paul parent educator and "the ultimate alternative to googling a parenting issue," in Walsh’s words.
Chisholm helped facilitate "coffee group" discussions around the goals of a potential school-age program. "We were able to identify key issues ranging from homework to cheating to discipline, but the biggest challenge was how to connect the dots." The Working Family Resource Center already offered existing programs tailored to work sites. "It just took a few minor adjustments adapting to a community model," says Beth Quist, director of education and development.
How it works
PEP curriculum is loosely based on the Positive Parenting Curriculum developed by University of Minnesota Extension Service, but parents have a lot of leeway to chart their own course.
"Our first class was an intake for gathering topics and building an outline for the session," explains Monell Jakel, PEP’s parent educator, who has 23 years of experience under her belt. But planned topics often give way to more timely concerns. Lisa Harrington, who found out about PEP from a Groveland Elementary flier, enthusiastically describes a "building friendships" class that veered into a lively discussion of allowance. "One mom even brought in an age-based allowance spreadsheet."
"This class makes us better parents, but without guilt or stress," says Karen Chaput, who had her now 7-year-old daughter when she was 45. Chaput sees PEP as "a lifeline of camaraderie" when most of her peers have long since passed through the school-age gauntlet.
Among big concerns on the docket this session is emotional development. "My 7-year-old can express herself articulately, but her mind often seems ahead of her emotions," explains Chaput. "I need help understanding how to step back and look at her with developmental empathy." Another key topic will be monitoring, i.e. how parents stay on top of where their kids are, what they’re doing, and with whom. "Today’s parents aren’t as comfortable as they once were looking after each other’s kids," explains Jakel, "and once they get into school, looking out for our own kids becomes even more complicated."
Studies have documented the success of long-term parenting education programs like PEP. The Centers for Disease Control analyzed 77 such programs and showed that those that work encourage positive interaction and emotional communication, encourage parenting consistency (particularly with discipline and the use of time out), and require parents to practice these skills in class. The WRFC’s own evaluation concludes that "attitude and behavioral outcomes supporting development and school readiness are more likely after an extended session than a single workshop."
That means that what’s good for Mom and Dad is good for the kids. "A lot of parents overlook the ‘trickle down effect’ of gaining support for themselves," says Jill Chisolm.
Sheff Otis is a Twin Cities father and writer. He writes the Kid Fit column for Minnesota Parent.
Join the class
To find out more or to register for upcoming sessions, call the Working Family Resource Center at 651-293-5330.
